mixed emotions

A levels are over... kinda... i mean a chem mcq left but got to practise too. it is kinda sad that after all th e hard work i have put i dont feel any sort of happiness that wow... As are so over. i feel a tinge of sadness. this whole jc process have caused me to have lowered my ambitions considerably. i guess cos i never really worked hard from the start despite being behind othere. dont really want to predict whatsoever crappy grades i may get. cos i am never happy after any paper. i feel so PATHETIC. grrr... just hope that i can pop into a local uni. but my good friends know that local uni is really not where i wanna go.
i was so stressed out during A levels even though my mum and sis keep yakking off their monstrous mouth i am not hardworking, i may not succeed in life. whatever.. yes! i am worried that i may not be able to enjoy my current standard of living in the future. but they need not put me down any further. freaking disgusting what detrimental effects people's mouth have. it pretty much sucks.
anyway, here are some of the sick side effects that came popping out of my body during A levels: i have a pimple breakout, ezcema breakout (sick), eye bags, i said weird things while sleeping like dont eat my heart to my maid and looked cramped up while sleeping. haha... i hope all of these will never come back ever.
after the whole freakish jc experience, i pretty much know that i am not a brain person cos i gotta work my hands too... NO! THAT DOES NOT INCLUDE WRITING! haha... i hope to find a degree course where there are some technical aspects but surely not anything that has got to do with sciences.
anyway, wish me luck in trying to get back my tuition fees from my bloody physics tuition tr! he had lessons on the previous days when there is gp and worst of all at night before physics. blegh... so fucking last minute la.. oh yeah. hope that i will remember anything i studied for A LEVELS. haha.. i dun think so... give me a couple of minutes.. oops? what is statistics?